Wenches & Scallywags of th’ Guangzhou Hash,

Th' only recognized religion o' th' Guangzhou Hash be th' Hash religion, itself, but this week we honor th' other world belief that be closest t' truth; Pastafarianism. Saturday we pay recpec’ t' th' Flyin' Spaghetti Monster fer reachin' down His noodly appendage 'n givin' life t' Man, 'n passin' on th' true belief in 'im t’ th’ prophets of His goodness – the men of the sea, the buccaneer, THE PIRATE!
 
Th' trail o' this week will surely be one t' th' heart o' any true buccaneer. Aft th' national meetin' in Sanya left us wit' a surprisingly wee number o' swim spots, th' Guangzhou crew be here t' give ye wha' yer wee heart desires.
If ye don't enjoy runnin', swimmin' 'n drinkin' ale, this ain't th' event fer ye, ye salty sea bass. Best stay ashore 'n leave th' fun t' th' professionals.
 
I leave ye in prayer: 
 
Thy noodle come, Thy sauce be yum, on top some grated Parmesan. Give us this day our garlic sea biscuit, 'n forgive us our trespasses, as we forgive those who trample on our lawns. 'n lead us nah into vegetarianism, but deliver us some pizza, fer thine be th' meatball, th' onion, 'n th' bay leaves, forever 'n ever.  
 
Ramen.  
 
-The Hares